Of Age and Coolness

                 Do you want to know what's my favorite figure of speech? Metaphors. Loved it. They are a stepping stone of sarcasm. And sarcasm in people attracts me like a magnet. I totally forgot why I started talking about metaphors at the start of this post. Anyways, I will let you guys know If I am able to remember it at all through the course of this blog. Forgetting things is getting normalized these days. RIP my razor sharp memory. Adding razor before sharp is a sign of my materialistic addictions in this capitalist world. Back to forgetting things now - It's happening, the ageing and it's mild effects are conquering me. It's fearful and nerve wrecking at the same time. 

                Last month I scolded my little sister due to her ignorance of Pythagoras theorem. She didn't know it and I got furious because literally that's the easiest theorem one can learn. Sadly, she stopped talking to me after the incident. And I realized, I wasn't the coolest big sister in the family. God I dreamt so hard to be one. None of my younger cousins have shared anything fun or problematic with me. I was seconds away from googling ' How to be a cool elder sibling'. But Hey! Cool people don't google such stuff. It should come naturally and that thought tossed me into a big pool of self doubts. I started observing things from the perspective of coolness window. I called another cousin on his birthday. And he spoke with me for like 2 mins and passed the phone to his sister(not the Pythagoras one) who gave her valuable 3 minutes to me and then the kids said that I might want to talk to their Mom, with whom I ended up speaking for 30 minutes. I mean come on, gimme a break. I am not that grown up. Who has set up these rules of acting grown up and behaving properly. I am chaos inside kids, if only you could see. My mind is still in it's teenage years and it's probably making some immature decisions which I am going to regret. 

                Till the age of 25, you are seriously okay. Nobody treats you like an adult. Once you cross the quarter, you are in for a ride. I don't know if it's a written rule or something, older folks have started relating their stuff with mine. The younger peeps have started being hideous and distant. Cherry on the cake was getting married. It has blown the coolness factor by minus exponential hundreds. You know when you can see the signs of ageing? Don't listen to cosmetic companies because it's not those wrinkles on your faces but the types of conversations people have with you. The older ones let you in to their secret adult gossips of families or judgmental analysis of same family members whom you were supposed to respect and not question though however dumb they were. Now it's like I have got a free ticket to criticize someone I didn't like all these years in front of my parents. They don't lecture me on being good with everyone. I lecture them for being way too good unnecessarily. Tables are turning, they are making some noise, it's probably the demise of coolness. Doom.                     

                Back to Pythagoras - I have felt guilt of pushing my cousins into this rat race by raging over a mathematical theorem. I wondered when and where I used it in real life. I mean I keep looking at the square tiles of the floor and hypothetically draw a hypotenuse. But never had the guts to bring a ruler and measure the sides to calculate the hypotenuse. It's pointless and so were my totally uncalled tantrums. I think I have found a way for amends. At first it was ignorance(trust me this makes anyone look cool), but later came to a more matured plan of being patient and understanding. Because what's this coolness anyways? Being an easy and go to person who knows interesting stuff and can totally relate with anything you share. How hard could it be? 

                   I accept the fact that I have changed too. I did a complete 180 degree reading interest flip from fiction to non-fiction. I find interests only in information and facts(non-fiction) rather than fantasy flavored scarce information(fiction). I don't post random photos/videos with random quotes to invite people to ask about my emotional well being. I admit I have done that stuff ten years ago just to look cool. Realizations have hit hard. I have learnt no matter how expensive and stylish clothes I buy, they are not going to look good on me unless I tone my body. Gosh! I can't afford to lose even 2 hours watching a movie that's totally out of genre. That shit, which seemed boring and useless in early years of life is suddenly the trophy content of adult life. I am more curious about how civilizations have come to this point and what were the milestones of this human journey. How sitting idle can push me into the arms of depression and keeping my mind busy into productivity. Tables have really turned. And they are making some noise, it's probably the crisis of existence. Rise. 

Is it abnormal? You tell me. Fellow adults, are you still the coolest? Or does the definition change as we grow?